This is becoming one of my favorite scriptures, sometimes in a hold-onto-it-with-white-knuckles kind of a way.

“¶ Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6

I think trust and fear are opposites.
In the scriptural context “save me” doesn’t necessarily mean deliver me from certain experiences, though it can mean that, as in the two examples you cited. I think Mosiah 24:15 exemplifies the other kind of “saving” in mortality:

“ And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord.”

The Lord sees the end from the beginning. He says his purposes cannot be frustrated (D&C 3:1). He says :
“For behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” Moses 1:39.
He also says:
“Verily I say unto you my friends, fear not, let your hearts be comforted; yea, rejoice evermore, and in everything give thanks;… and all things wherewith you have been afflicted shall work together for your good, and to my name’s glory, saith the Lord. D&C 98:1,3.

When I am fearful, I am saying that I don’t want or like some of the opportunities and experiences that are ordained of God to be part of my mortal probation. And for me, that not wanting and not liking constitute resistance to God. So maybe it would be better for me to just say it that way. I am resisting God’s plans for me. The scriptures say that “ all these things (and I think even these things that you mention:
“something in my life” was actually brought there BY God? That it is HIS will for my life? Maybe the thing I “don’t like or don’t want” was brought about by my own sin, my own stupidity, the sin or stupidity of someone else…or maybe it’s just part of the course of life.”)
shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.” D&C 122:7 “And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high” D&C 121:8.

I don’t think that enduring it well means that we are not to sorrow at the loss of loved ones, even the heavens sorrowed at the suffering of Father’s children. Pain and suffering are uncomfortable at the least and well, “painful”, what mortal wants or likes either? I think also that learning to endure well is a process and the Lord is perfectly patient and loving with us in the process.
The Lord is omniscient and omnipotent. I believe he permits our lives to unfold, knowing that we need to learn to choose good from evil, by experience with opposition, “Wherefore, man could not act for himself save it should be that he was enticed by the one or the other.” 2 Nephi 2:16
The very stance that I describe I take, when I am fearful, shows that I am in opposition to his will. His will is for me to lay down my “weapons” and open my heart, to love him and others. To be one with Him and with my brothers and sisters.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and I hope this helps a little.

These are good questions…ones that I think swim in all of our minds at some time or another.

At the risk of speaking for Irene, the sense that I got from her was that this piece addressed more those things that we can’t control…things that we wish could change but can’t or won’t, with no ability for us to change anything about them ourselves — except our attitude and perspective.

That said, I still think we can mull over what you said in light of what Irene brings out here. Weight challenges, for example, are a tough one. Maybe they aren’t all-consuming for you, but I have met people for whom such issues are. It’s clear that this is not a challenge experienced by everyone, either because of biology/genetics, or habits, or whatever. The fact that there are widely varying experiences with this issue (hope you don’t mind that I piggyback off your personal example) suggests to me that we each have our own experiences. Did God cause your baby weight to stick? Maybe not, but He knew you would struggle with it. And He could have given you a body that had no baby fat issues, right? So, to me, whether our trials (things we may not like) were “caused” or “allowed” by God, or are simply part of mortality (which is also all in God’s control, either on the “cause” or “allow” side of things), doesn’t matter as much as the perspective that 1. God is in control and 2. that we can receive His help in our hard times.

I really like this from Pres. Kimball (in the manual, ch. 2):
I am sure that sometime we’ll understand [tragedy and trial] and be reconciled. But for the present we must seek understanding as best we can in the gospel principles….

The basic gospel law is free agency and eternal development. To force us to be careful or righteous would be to nullify that fundamental law and make growth impossible.

I think a lot depends on our hearts. It’s one thing to mourn and struggle (to “not like” something) in an honest, humble struggle (even the Savior didn’t like or didn’t necessarily want Gethsemane…He wanted His cup to pass). Do we let struggle bring us to God? Do we hurt with an attitude of “Thy will be done”? Do we realize that all things can work together for good if we love God? Do we accept the trials in humility, regardless of their cause? Do we do all we can do and seek for grace to help us through what we can’t control? That to me is faith. It’s another thing to throw a temper tantrum, selfishly have a pity party, shake our fists at heaven, etc….things that can pull us away from God. I think we can hurt but still have faith in a “But if Not” kind of a way.

Ah, looooong response.

I also wanted to bring up this comment:

“When I don’t like or don’t want something in my life (and fear fits both scenarios) I am saying that I know a better way for me than God does;”

I struggle with this thought, because I’m not sure if it’s true–or at least I’m not sure WHEN it’s true and when it’s not.

Can we assume that “something in my life” was actually brought there BY God? That it is HIS will for my life? Maybe the thing I “don’t like or don’t want” was brought about by my own sin, my own stupidity, the sin or stupidity of someone else…or maybe it’s just part of the course of life.

I’m on a quest to lose a bunch of baby weight. I don’t like it and I don’t want it. Honestly, I don’t think that means I don’t trust God or think I know better. I do think it means that I have to get off my duff and do something about it…which is why I just got off the treadmill.

“I am essentially saying that I can’t trust the Lord to direct and save me.”

I also struggle with this. (I’ve been involved in a similar discussion on my site about this.) This statement implies that we are wrong when we don’t trust the Lord to save us. Ultimately, it is absolutely true that he will–in the sense of offering eternal salvation, and we must trust in that. But in the sense of “saving” us from our trials–or the things we “don’t like and don’t want” in our lives–very often he really will NOT. Good, righteous people die, have disease, and all manner of horrible worldly things happen to them and those they love. Does the faith we are commanded to have require us to ignore the reality that we will sometimes we will be Daniel and sometimes Abinidi?

When I have listened to President Hinckley, Elder Nelson, Elder Wirthlin, speak of the great loneliness they experienced at the loss of their spouses–just as my own father does–it seems to me that “not wanting or not liking” a circumstance in our lives (even those, perhaps, more directly controlled by God than any) isn’t sinful or wrong. And maybe it can exist in complete harmony with trust and faith.

I hope that you will not see my post as contentious. This is truly something I struggle with internally and welcome input from others about it.

But I tend to fall back into old habits, and defensiveness is one that I think a lot of us fall prey to. Thanks for reminding me with that graphic image that I want to keep my heart open and accessible–to others, and to the Lord, Irene.