The Power of a Broken Heart
We’d like to welcome a new guest writer, Kirsi. Following is her first submission.
And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness…. (Ether 12:27 )
Ether 12:27 is one of those oft-read and little understood scriptures. I learned it first as a scripture mastery verse in seminary, but I have yet to truly learn it. Some time ago, when trying to discover what to do with my life, it came to me that my profession didn’t matter. What I wanted to be was a disciple. I wanted my life to be a dedication to my Savior. I got rid of my music. I changed my clothing. I changed my friends. I made a covenant with the Lord to guide me on the path of discipleship. But coming “unto the Lord” is not a romantic, beautiful trip when one is on the path. It is rocky, seems to twist and turn so you do not know what is ahead, and is sometimes downright dangerous. But the Lord never promised otherwise.
We often see trials and tribulation as hardships to get through, obstacles to learn from, or ways to prove ourselves to God. There is a compelling scene in the movie (or book, if you are a geek like me) called Neverending Story. In it, one of the main characters, Atreyu, must pass through a gate to see the Southern Oracle and learn how to save his world. Before he can pass this gate, he will see himself as he truly is. Brave men, he is told, discover they are cowards. Kind men discover they are cruel. Most run away, screaming.
The same could be said of the gospel and the road to discipleship. When we dedicate ourselves to Christ, God sends us trials. He does not send them to tempt us from the road of discipleship. He doesn’t send them to make us stronger. He sends them to teach us who we are, to show us our weaknesses, to give us a mirror to see ourselves – to break our hearts. Why do we need to know our weaknesses?
I give unto men weakness that they may be humble
The Lord needs a humble people. In “The Faces of Pride” President Benson said “God will have a humble people. Either we can choose to be humble or we can be compelled to be humble.” By recognizing our weaknesses, and accepting chastisement from the Lord, we become humble. Humility is an attribute often mocked. Paradoxically, without humility we cannot wield the power of God. By refusing to be humble, we deprive ourselves of the very power that literally moves mountains, heals the sick and changes hearts. Once we become humble, the Lord has promised us a great blessing:
. . . if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them. (emphasis added)
The most interesting aspect of this blessing to me, personally, is that we are not told that we will become strong. We are told that Christ will make us strong. All too often, we wrap ourselves in ritual, feeling that if we only read our scriptures, fast once per month, attend the temple, hold family home evening, attend Church meetings and activities and hold regular prayer that we will make ourselves into a sort of spiritual Hercules. Women are particularly susceptible to this image of perfection. But this perception is not true. God will make us strong. What’s more, not only will He make us strong, but He will make our very weaknesses strengths. The things that we see as our greatest liabilities, He can use to “thrash the nations with [His] Spirit.” (D&C 35:13)
This is no small promise. Like so many things in the gospel, we must see our weakness to become strong. We must lose ourselves to find ourselves. We must serve in order to someday rule.
Kirsi shares this about herself: “I am the product of a military family, meaning I have nowhere I consider my home, and have lived over a third of my life overseas. I graduated from BYU with a pre-vet med degree and went straight to work as a graphic designer. I served a mission later than I planned and then married much sooner than planned. Currently, I live in Salt Lake City and dream of the day I can move to Oregon, stay home with my daughter and raise Scottish Deerhound and AraAppaloosa.
May 10th, 2007 01:10
These are such powerful principles. Sometimes it’s hard to get my mind and heart around it all, but I really know that what you have discussed here is real and true. And it’s actually empowering if I could just remember it and live it and trust in it all rather than getting frustrated with my weaknesses and with the “learn by experience” processes.
Thank you for this piece. Very profound, indeed.
May 10th, 2007 05:50
Your post is just what I needed at this moment in my life. I have recently been pondering Elder Bednar’s talk, “In the Strength of the Lord,” which is about the enabling, as well as redeeming power of the Atonement. I thought I was trying to become humble enough in various aspects of my life to receive strength from the Lord.
Your observation that the Lord sends us trials “to teach us who we are, to show us our weaknesses, to give us a mirror to see ourselves – to break our hearts,” was exactly what I needed today. I realized that I was turning away from a giant mirror that was right in front of me at this very moment.
We are in the final days of packing up for a move, and I have been increasingly upset with myself, because I felt like I was mentally and physically falling way short of handling the demands of this project.
Because I am usually fairly calm and capable in stressful situations, it has been extremely hard for me to admit that right now I can’t, on my own, be perfectly organized, remember a million details, and get things accomplished smoothly.
My heart is already lighter. I am ready to admit that I am not Super-moving-woman, and I have faith that the Lord will give me the strength I need to do what needs to be done. I will now quit blogging and go to work!
May 10th, 2007 12:44
Kirsi, this is really interesting. I’ll have to read it over another time or two to grasp it all, but I think you are on to something! There is so much depth to the gospel and so much to learn and assimilate. I appreciate your insights–I hadn’t thought about the “teach us who we are” part. I also liked your pointing out some of the paradoxes–”Paradoxically, without humility we cannot wield the power of God. By refusing to be humble, we deprive ourselves of the very power that literally moves mountains, heals the sick and changes hearts.” and “Like so many things in the gospel, we must see our weakness to become strong. We must lose ourselves to find ourselves. We must serve in order to someday rule.” Thanks!
May 10th, 2007 16:13
Kirsi, what a powerful post! I particularly liked your insight about how God doesn’t send trials to make us stronger. “He sends them to teach us who we are, to show us our weaknesses, to give us a mirror to see ourselves – to break our hearts.” I know that oft times I tell myself–”this trial will make me strong” and it undoubtedly does, but that is not the sole purpose for my trials. Thank you for the beautiful reminder!
May 10th, 2007 17:40
Thank you, everyone. I admit to having struggled to be coherent. I’m glad the messages peeped through the verbiage. This concept is one I have struggled with for quite some time - that it’s okay to be weak, and that it isn’t my job to become strong.
Can you tell I’m a bit of a perfectionist?
June 16th, 2007 14:46
Thank you — this was a beautiful reminder.
March 14th, 2008 06:49
Hi
I appreciate very much your heartfelt article.
May God Bless you abundantly.
April 20th, 2008 21:27
Reminds me of something a great teacher once taugh me.
“We are not here on earth to prove to God what we are capable of. He already knows. We are on earth to show to ourselves what we really are.”
It went something like that.